Liz Erk (lizerk) wrote,
Liz Erk
lizerk

New at this...

Well, this is new for me... I'm not one to typically keep a journal, let alone one online. I have horrible handwriting, so I figured the best place to organize my thoughts through writing would be on the PC. I can type a lot faster than I write and my thoughts tend to move too quickly for longhand. : )

Anyway, where to begin. Hmmm. I suppose I can start with the basics... I'm 24 years old, live in a nice suburb in MA, and am currently job hunting. I got laid off by a really crappy software company about a month ago. I was the Director or PR, but they were not ready for someone like me by any means. Perhaps I'll go further into that when I have the energy. It's a long story.

So, why am I deciding to keep a journal? Because I have a lot going on in my head these days, I thought it might be nice to organize my thoughts to some degree and just have an outlet.

I'm a Fitness Specialist at an all-women's gym in Boston called Healthworks. It's AWESOME. So I have free membership and workout at the facility closer to where I live. The instructors are great. Especially in the morning and at night. So tonight I'm going to take back to back Spin. One at 7:30, one at 8:30.

(My biggest thing lately is Spinning. It has become my winter salvation, so to say. I get very bored, fitness wise, during the winter months. So when I began taking Spin in December, I nearly fainted with joy.)

After that I'm going to visit the guy I'm seeing. We've been dating for exactly four months now. I'm a little confused though. I'm bisexual and it's not just a physical thing. For me it's not the person's gender, but who they are. This guy I'm seeing, we'll call him M, is absolutely wonderful. I've never dated a guy before that I've wanted to keep around this long, hee hee. The last two relationships I've had were with women, both lasting over a year and a half.

M and I have been friends for over two years and used to work together. When I quit my job, we got together. He's like the male version of me. We have so much fun together!

So what's the problem? I'm not sure what I want. Part of me still longs for the companionship of a woman. So I'm having a hard time with the idea of being committed to M. We haven't exactly discussed it, but neither of us is sleeping with anyone else either. So who knows? But 4 months is a significant amount of time, so I imagine we'll have to talk about it sometime soon.

Anyway, I think I'm going to stop for now. I have so much to say, but I think I'll write about current things in my life and then discuss my past history with it's relevance to whatever's happening at the time.
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