I think I woke up at 5:00 a.m. I'm going crazy! I got this e-mail from a former Supervisor of mine in response to my request for her to be a reference:
"OF COURSE I'll put in a good word for you! Please, you made life at MST exciting, fun and brought a creative energy to every project."
Gah! I want this!
Hmmm... and it's Pride week no less...
This Week: 06/04/01 - 06/10/01
Lost in dreams, you coast through Monday, Sag, and most of those dreams concern your love life. Why does it always seem to be better in your imagination than it is in reality?
Some of those dreams come true on Tuesday and Wednesday, though. Filled with happiness and self-confidence, you draw even more strength and joy from the love of a committed partner or the interest of a new love.
You and your partner may need to have the 'money talk' on Thursday and Friday to bring spending in line with income, but once that situation is resolved, the weekend is wide open for you to get out and have some real fun. Accept any party invitations that come your way. Go ahead and dress to the nines. It will make the event even more special.
This is the latest from one of my references:
"Just had the most pleasant conversation with Matrix. Told her all about GOT BAIL, how you rented a cop costume. How independent and creative you are. P**** really likes you! (how could she not?) Not to get your hopes up, but when she left me a message this morning she said, "hi this is P****, calling from Matrix, I'd like to extend Liz Erk an offer pending on her references." She told me at the end of the call that all of your other references were consistently great!"
I can't stand this...! Someone from above is torturing me...!
Just got exactly what I needed. I've been going absolutely insane with waiting to hear from Matrix. M called and asked if I'd like to go for a ride after he got home from work and I was psyched.
We rode for over an hour, but halfway through we stopped to watch the sun set over Boston. It was cool... the moon was already out, the sky a fading blend of blue, pink, purple, gray...
It was nice to just sit and talk with him. I've been so stressed out these past few months with the job situation. He's been amazingly supportive and understanding.
Plus tonight he said some really sweet things-- about how he can sense that I'm still uncertain about so many issues. He's got that right. The boy's quite astute! : )
As we sat together, it was nice to be so calm and at peace. I know that eventually I'll be with the one I'm meant for. But it's so tough sometimes. There are moments where I hate being bi. This evening was one of 'em.
It's not even so much that I dislike being gay, I just hate the emotional element of it at times. Most bi women I know are what I'd classify as "trendy bi's." Meaning they are bi because they like to sleep with women, not because they'd care to have a relationship with one.
But then I meet a lot of lesbians who give me a hard time about it. They'll say, "Oh, you just can't admit you're a lesbian. You're a sell-out..."
I've almost knocked a few of those bitches' teeth in. Yeah, like they know so much about what it's like to be me.
So, it's just rough. It gets me down. I meet so many amazing people and get pulled in way too many directions.
Oh well, tonight's not the night to get into heavy thinking with myself. For once I'm too tired. : ) I should go on evening bike rides more often.
And dammit! Matrix better call tomorrow...!