Liz Erk (lizerk) wrote,
Liz Erk

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Never Never Idol

I personally couldn't give two sh*ts about American Idol. The only time I liked watching it was in the intial try-out stage. I laughed my ass off.

Then they were down to about 1000, most butchering songs I'd never liked to begin with, so I barely ever watched. Sarah's all into it though, so most nights I was stuck falling asleep to the voices of Simon ("you were absolutely horrid..."), Randy ("What up, dog, you did your thing man, but it didn't jive with me, dude...) and Paula ("I love you just the way you are... now come here and bang me, you 18 year-old piece of ass...")

Last night I layed in bed, listening to Kelly Clarkson warble some song, followed by an old man tottering out on stage to say how everyone's a talented winner, and periodically I'd open my eyes to see sweaty Ruben and I'd briefly wonder if we'd get to watch him have a heart attack. Then at one point the camera showed Justin GuarWeenie (aka- Sideshow Bob) in the audience, with his creepy smile and frumpy fro.

Then there's Clay. I don't know, that kid was weird. Everyone is all, "He's so cute and sweet..." Nah. I can't stand his voice and especially the way he holds long notes, especially "O" and "R."

So in my media reading this morning I came across this paragraph in a Boston Globe article:

"While the notion of an American idol triggers images of Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake, the two 24-year-old finalists were notable for their lack of MTV-esque appeal. Studdard's triumph was the result of his happy vibe and smooth-yet-scratchy vocal stylings, not a buff body and acrobatic moves. Overweight, he never appeared at ease with the physical rigors of the show. Aiken also falls outside the idol stereotype, with his asexual, Peter Pan-like presence. ''I prefer you when I shut my eyes,'' judge Simon Cowell once told him."

ASEXUAL PETER PAN!!!!!!!!!!!! Hahahahaha!!!!!

So anyway, I can't stand Kelly Clarkson at all and I was worried I'd be doomed to hear Clay Aiken on the radio all the time. But it looks like I lucked out. I actually like Reuben. I figured he'd win all along when they were down to the top 10, but there was always that small chance...

Though I'd NEVER want to be in charge of his wardrobe. Imagine how drenched in sweat each outfit must have been after every song!!! Yikk.

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