My thoughts on the Paula Abdul scandal...
WHO THE HELL CARES???
I don't doubt Paula probably did get a piece of Corey. Good for her, tapping a 22 year old. (Or as he phrased it, became his "special friend." And yes, I'm shamefully admitting to have watched the stupid Primetime show last night.)
Here's what I have a problem with: He's BUTT.
Though I do applaud her efforts to make him look like another contestant she had truly lusted after:
(it was all probably very expensive when you consider what a train wreck Corey is)
What I really think this boils down to is Paula's obvious cartoon character fetish. It's no secret that Justin Guarini bore a stark resemblance to SideShow Bob...
So perhaps Corey represents Paula's lust for SideShow Bob's brother, Cecil? After all, when we can't get what we want, we go after the next best thing, right?
And lest we forget, Paula's pension for animated love truly began way back in the 80's when she decided to make the "Opposites Attract" music video with MC Skat Kat:
Poor Paula... the heart of the matter is just painfully obvious. She never did get over Skat Kat. Her desire for SideShow Bob and torrid affair with Cecil were really just her attempts to either move on from that lost love or make him jealous.
Or maybe it's both. Sadly, we may never know.