Liz Erk (lizerk) wrote,
Liz Erk


I admit, I fell into the lazy pattern of regular Facebook status updating (aka- ghetto microblogging) and my LJ drifted to the wayside. Well, no more! (Aren't you all so lucky!)

For the past few weeks I have been borderline-obsessively working on my backyard. I decided this was the year I would host summer get-togethers and have guests over in general. Well, you gotta have a decent yard to do such a thing, right?

At about the same time I was getting out and making my whole body sore with yard work to the point I couldn't move, I saw a spike in FarmVille Facebook updates. I was in disbelief at the amount of people who sit and grow virtual crops, strike pretend oil, and deal with wayward pink cows. So with that, my own Yardville was born:

Liz has been tending to her yard this Spring! She has seeded and fertilized her grass, planted flowers and added new accents. Once in a while a neighborhood cat, skunk or squirrel visits Liz's Yardville, digging up her bulbs. As much as she loves animals, she fantasizes about throwing things at the furry bandits if she ever catches them ruining her work.

Location: Real Life

I decided I wanted to move my Yardville progress over to LJ since it's easier to do in this format, is more organized, and well, it's fun to write about. And on that note, I will catch you all up on what's been happening:

May 26- Liz is grateful to her Mom for sharing her NY Yardville flowers! Liz has worked hard to maintain them, and has been enjoying the fruits of her Yardville labor. To accent the new flowers, Liz added solar lights to the pots.

May 26- Oh happy day! Noah has helped Liz by building her a table in Yardville's Decktown.

May 26- Oh no! A lonely kitty statue has wandered into Liz's Yardville! To keep the kitty from being scared, Liz added a solar light to the potted plant next to her.

May 26- Oh no! Liz's grass is growing strong in Yardville, but alas there are weeds invading the border! Won't someone help?!

May 27- Oh dear! Liz is having a sh*tty day in Yardville! She bought a fountain and discovered that after the nightmare of buying it, wrestling it into the car, getting it home, constructing it, having the box's packing material break apart and blow all over Yardville, the EFFING THING DOESN'T EFFING WORK!!!! @#$%!!! She called bLowes and they are making her bring the whole effing thing back in order to get the one effing SMALL part that's not effing functioning. She warned the rep that she will demand the replacement be tested in the store before accepting it.

May 27- The tide has turned in Yardville! When we last visited Liz, she was beside herself with blazing anger at her newly-purchased Decktown fountain. However, after taking a hammer (and some choice words) to the fountain, a miracle has occurred and the water is flowing properly! The bLowes staff dodged a bullet... the return would not have been pretty.

May 27- Oh delightful times abound! Now that Liz has sufficiently recovered from the Decktown Fountain Saga, she is now ready to construct deck railing flower boxes! She will attempt this amazing feat without any help and very little patience. Instead of pre-grown flowers, Liz will be using this seed carpet thing that promises lots of color and butterflies. It better not be lying. False advertising yields false hope for botanically-challenged Liz, and that will not be tolerated in Yardville.

May 28- Oh dear! Liz survived the Great Fountain Saga and a minor bird attack (she startled a small one in a shrub that flew out at her face), only to get her hands all over poison ivy oak under her deck while putting away the garden hose. Beautifying Yardville has certainly been stressful! But no matter what, Liz will never EVER play Farmville.

May 30- Liz has been working hard at Yardville, but is feeling murderous today. Something dug up one of her bulbs during the night and ate it! Liz would like to trade in her Decktown Fountain for a gun.

June 2- The vultures are circling Yardville! Well, not really. Liz decided to throw away the old ghetto chairs from Decktown, and within 5 minutes of dropping them at the curb, this Trashpicking Taurus arrived. (From the looks of that car, it appears they obtained it the same way they probably get everything else) These guys are pros, it was fascinating to watch them load and bungee the two very large metal chairs into the trunk in under a minute. Let's see what they can do with Yardville's old lawnmower next week!

June 2- Ask and ye shall receive in Yardville! Just when Liz was wondering about whether or not the Trashpicking Taurus duo would take her old nasty lawnmower, along came more hardcore Trash Vultures! These guys had a truck loaded with all kinds of crap and stopped to pick up an old bent and rusty Decktown plant stand. Liz asked the guys if they wanted an old lawnmower and voila! "Chays," one of the Vultures eagerly answered. Liz took that as "yes" and wheeled the muddy mess to them. It's a banner day in Yardville!


Tags: yardville

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